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Days 96 - 97
Apr. 6th, 2016 10:02 pmCycle: mixed state
Mood: anxious and crashing
Created: paranormal romance
Had a big bad thing happen at the new job. Wasn't my fault, but falls under my area, so I'm responsible. Stressed hard core over it, told Partner I was sure they were going to fire me, nearly in tears, definitely having the beginnings of an anxiety attack, but I kept pushing through it, pushing and pushing, and I've finally come to exhausted acceptance. Shit happens, this happened, and there's nothing I could have done to stop it, not with the mess I've been brought in to fix.
I never reached that point with the last way I tackled this career, not even after years and years, so that's something.
Had lunch yesterday with a dear friend, and we talked a lot about the portrayal of bipolar characters, especially in YA, and how their stories aren't told. She encouraged me to write about it myself, and I am; one of the main characters in the YA BFF and I have been working on the past couple years has bipolar.
Learned two members of my writing group are being brought in as professionals at this writing convention we're all attending later this year, and had a moment of terrible, destructive envy. Moved on.
I guess the lesson here is to just keep pushing through, and eventually I'll hit a point where I can move on. Not from the bipolar, of course, but from everything else.
Mood: anxious and crashing
Created: paranormal romance
Had a big bad thing happen at the new job. Wasn't my fault, but falls under my area, so I'm responsible. Stressed hard core over it, told Partner I was sure they were going to fire me, nearly in tears, definitely having the beginnings of an anxiety attack, but I kept pushing through it, pushing and pushing, and I've finally come to exhausted acceptance. Shit happens, this happened, and there's nothing I could have done to stop it, not with the mess I've been brought in to fix.
I never reached that point with the last way I tackled this career, not even after years and years, so that's something.
Had lunch yesterday with a dear friend, and we talked a lot about the portrayal of bipolar characters, especially in YA, and how their stories aren't told. She encouraged me to write about it myself, and I am; one of the main characters in the YA BFF and I have been working on the past couple years has bipolar.
Learned two members of my writing group are being brought in as professionals at this writing convention we're all attending later this year, and had a moment of terrible, destructive envy. Moved on.
I guess the lesson here is to just keep pushing through, and eventually I'll hit a point where I can move on. Not from the bipolar, of course, but from everything else.
